Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
I think my vagina is haunted
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Randomize
