were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
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