I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
she smelled like a LAN party
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the EMT asked how you broke your nose and you said, "you know, the usual wear and tear."
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
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