ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
Randomize
