I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
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