I wanted to dispute a few 411 charges on my phone bill. The service rep told me I called them four times asking for Lady Gaga's number.
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
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