whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
You know you have a problem when you walk into your bathroom find kettle one in your shower and a note you wrote yourself when drunk that says "panties at jared leto's" on your counter
Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
Randomize
