my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
Randomize
