Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
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btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
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White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?