bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
Randomize