don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
why is there a dog in my house with your initials shaved in it's fur?
dude, i just woke up in a house i've never seen. i have bigger problems
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
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