I want to make a zoo with you.
I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
Randomize
