We named our party play list daddy issues
I just realized that "Hey girl, when you gonna let me tap that?" is in iambic pentameter. I'm going to write a poem...
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
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