At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
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