My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
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