Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
