did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
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