She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
Sorry my hands just texted you
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
Randomize
