Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
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