I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize