Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
Dear drunk me, don't shave my balls til you're sober. My junk looks like a pomeranian with mange.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
Randomize
