Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.