i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
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