You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
I'm walking home wearing Kermit the frog footie pajamas, carrying a monogrammed shot glass set with my name on it. It's fucking Christmas!
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
I am naked and annoyed.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
Randomize