it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
I don't know when it is this year, but if I ever text you an illegible text that also happens to contain sharks, Shark Week started.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
he high fived his dick after we had sex
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
