I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
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