i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
Randomize
