fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
My pants zipper is stuck halfway down. I have to interview an intern later. This day is gonna be amazing,
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
Randomize
