i don't like sucking hair
fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
I'm concerned I may die tonight. All I've been told about my bday shenanigans is to bring slutty clothes, a bikini, tylenol, sunglasses and pjs. Tell me what the fuck is going on...now
bring lube too
i hate all of you
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
Randomize
