in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
My mom was talking about how protein is essential to strong bones and then I told her, I'll give you protein.
How unfortunate for your Mom.
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
Randomize
