"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
Randomize