he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
Randomize
