Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Randomize
