i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
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