My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
Do vagina's smell?
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
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