sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
and i looked up. we had an audience...
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Randomize
