TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
Randomize
