kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
Randomize