my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
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