Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
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