apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
i now understand why vodka
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
It’s just a penis. It’s like every other penis except it’s not the one you’re married to. Ride it or don’t ride it, but don’t agonize about it
Your not going to hell because you need some strange and the neighbor noticed you look damn good in a bikini
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