Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
Randomize
