i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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