how do flat chested girls get laid?
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
