i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
I'm too drunk to remember your name. I'm too drunk to recall where i'm currently at. And i'm too drunk to give a shit.
Randomize
