I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
Randomize
