put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
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