The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
Randomize