it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
public service announcement: beginning at 10pm please text me at half hour intervals reminding me to keep my legs shut tonight. Note, this is not a drill.