I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
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