After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
I love you. Go after that dick
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
PANTIES FOUND
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