So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
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