barbara walters just said penis...
I think a homeless person took a bath in my mouth while I was sleeping :(
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
this is a preemptive text before you call me freaking out: i have your keys and your car is parked safely a block down from your apartment.
you are a goddess
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
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